Save Money, Live Better, Ouran
by Silverflower8910
Summary: Have you ever wondered what would happen if the Host Club went to Wal-Mart? Such rich, high class people in a commoner's superstore?  Maybe not the best idea, but humorous disasters ensue!  Slight TamaXHaru, a little Twincest. Rated T for language.
1. The Idea

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Ouran High School Host Club or its characters...or Wal-Mart**

Save Money, Live Better, Ouran

The Idea

"Haruhi! Ohhhh Haruhiiii!"

Who was the obnoxious voice calling her name? Haruhi turned around to see her idiotic, blonde haired senpai running at her, pushing through crowds of students in the main hallway. School just ended; what did Tamaki want now? Haruhi was heading to Music Room 3 shortly; he could've just talked to her there.

"Haruhi! I finally caught up with you," Tamaki began, catching his breath. "You know, when someone is calling your name, it's rude to walk away. Anyway, I need you for something." Haruhi looked up to see her senpai's eyes gleaming the way they normally did when he was up to something.

"What now senpai?" Haruhi asked impatiently. "Can't it wait until after the Host Club closes? Besides, I have to get my books and start walking over there or else I'll be late, _again_. And you know Kyoya-senpai increases my debt when I'm late!" Haruhi pushed past Tamaki and started to open her locker, but she could still feel his presence behind her. With a sigh, she grabbed the last book and slammed her locker closed loudly, in hopes to show her annoyance with the blonde. Taking no notice to her frustration, Tamaki put his arm around her and the two walked to Music Room 3 together, the halls empty because everyone had already left.

"So Haruhi," Tamaki started, and Haruhi was already worried. "I've heard of this thing that commoners have. It's a type of store, I would assume. A Wal-Mart I believe it's called and I would just love to go there! But of course, we'd need a commoner to show us around. We could go today after the Host Club is over and everyone can come along! Oh it'll be so much fun!" Tamaki seemed proud of his "brilliant" idea.

"Wal-Mart huh?" Haruhi mulled over the idea. Sure, Wal-Mart was a great store, but bringing the Host Club along didn't seem like the best idea. Such rich, high class people, in a commoner superstore? It was a scary combination, but Haruhi assumed Tamaki wouldn't take no for an answer, or he would use his puppy dog eyes on her and she would be forced to say yes. To avoid conflict, Haruhi sighed and said, "Alright, we can all go to Wal-Mart after the Host Club today."

"Oh thank you thank you Haruhi!" Tamaki yelled, jovial with her answer. They approached Music Room 3 and opened the door, Tamaki rushing over to tell Kyoya the plans for later.

"Hey Haruhi," two voices called to Haruhi, off in the right corner of the room.

"Haru-chan! You're finally here!" Hunny-senpai ran up to Haruhi and gave her a big hug as Mori-senpai followed behind.

"You realize Haruhi, that you were two minutes late, so that's how much I'm multiplying your debt by," Kyoya said with his trademark devil's grin.

"Why does everyone say hi to Haruhi? I came in with her too!" Tamaki was upset that he wasn't getting any attention.

"To tell you the truth boss–" Kaoru started.

"We don't really care about when you came in," finished Hikaru.

Haruhi went to sit at her table, ready for the first guests of the day. She noticed Tamaki in his "corner of woe" and sighed inwardly to herself. He was so childish sometimes. Haruhi heard the sound of the door opening and went into her position. Tamaki was the last to get into place, still upset about the twins' comment, but he put on a happy face as the girls walked in.

"Welcome!" everyone called out, and the work day began.

**AN: This is a pretty random idea right? But can you imagine the Hosts inside Wal-Mart? Scary right? Well Read and Review as always! Thanks so much to all my readers! ****~Kellie ^-.-^**


	2. A Long Car Ride

Save Money, Live Better, Ouran

A Long Car Ride

"Goodbye my darling maidens and may fate once again allow me to see your gorgeous faces once more." Tamaki always finished the day with a princely goodbye to everyone. Once the door finally closed as the last girl left, Tamaki turned and faced the Host Club, his fake, princely demeanor long gone.

"Alright gentleman! Now, we go to Wal-Mart! Haruhi was kind enough to offer to show us around this commoner superstore, so of course we must accept!"

_I didn't offer_, thought Haruhi, _you basically forced me to take you. Damn rich people_.

Pushing up his glasses, Kyoya said coolly, "I can get one of my company cars to take us there. When your ready Haruhi, that is."

With yet another sigh, she faced the raven-haired boy and said unenthusiastically, "I'm ready now senpai. Let's go."

All seven of them piled into an Ootori company car and drove away from Ouran Academy, towards a dreaded trip to Wal-Mart.

"Hey Haruhi, aren't there like three hundred ways to get kicked out of this place?" Hikaru asked.

"Umm yeah I think so," she responded, worried about the devilish smirk Hikaru gave to his twin.

Picking up on his brother's hint, Kaoru responded, "Interesting."

"Takashi, do you think they'll have cake there? I know Usa-chan is hungry," Hunny-senpai asked, holding out his supposedly hungry stuffed bunny.

"Yeah," grunted Mori-senpai, the usual response.

Tamaki was anxious for the car to stop so they could begin their trip. "This is so exciting! Isn't it Kyoya?"

Pushing his glasses farther up the bridge of his nose, Kyoya replied, "Just as long as you don't do anything stupid, or waste any of our money. You need to be careful about what you buy Tamaki."

"But the last time we went shopping was so much fun, wasn't it Kyoya?" Tamaki said, his childishness returning. "Remember? That's when I first bought Antoinette!"

"Yes. I remember," said Kyoya darkly. He did remember, how he was dragged to a commoner mall, half-asleep, and then left there by Tamaki. _That idiot. But I'll get him back_, thought Kyoya with an inward grin.

"So, umm, is there anything specific you guys are looking to buy? I can show you–" Haruhi was cut off as the car pulled into a parking spot and stopped.

"We have reached your destination sir," the driver said.

"Hooray!" Tamaki shouted, the twins giving him annoyed glances. The seven got out of the car and looked up at the building in front of them. Wal-Mart, the commoner superstore, was there and waiting for the Hosts.

Turning to the driver, Kyoya said, "Thank you and I'll contact you again for the return ride."

No one moved as the Ootori car pulled away, Tamaki, Hunny, and the twins in shock over the size of the store.

"I never knew commoners could build something so big," said Hikaru, in awe.

"Yeah, and I wonder how they have enough stuff to put in it," said Kaoru with a laugh.

"C'mon guys. We'd better just go in," said Haruhi, grabbing both the twins and pulling them toward the entrance. _Let's just get this over with_, she thought.

"Wait everyone!" Tamaki made the group stop so he could talk. "We should go in groups and then meet at the entrance in two hours. That way we can tell each other about all the interesting and commoner-like things we saw."

Kyoya liked the idea, which was a surprise because 90% of the time, anything Tamaki thought of was normally stupid. "Very well. Hunny and Mori, you two will be a group." Both nodded to each other in agreement. "Hikaru and Kaoru, you are a group."

"What?" protested the twins. "What about Haruhi? She should be in our group!"

Pushing up his glasses, the damn things always slipped down, Kyoya responded, "No, Haruhi will be with Tamaki." Haruhi and Tamaki both looked at each other, blushing, and in shock. Kyoya ignored this exchange and continued, "If she was with you, Tamaki would be alone, and I advise against that for the sake of funds."

"That sounds like a good plan Kyo-chan!" Hunny-senpai said excitedly.

"I guess that's alright," said the twins grudgingly.

"Sure, why not," said Haruhi with a shrug.

"Then let us proceed to Wal-Mart!" shouted Tamaki as he ran through the automatic doors, Haruhi following, head down.

"We're off too," stated the twins simultaneously, as they advanced into the store.

"Wait. Kyo-chan, what are you going to do? You weren't in a group," Hunny asked.

Flashing his devilish smile, Kyoya said, "Oh I have some, umm, _business_ to attend to in the management department." With a sarcastic laugh, he walked into the store.

Hunny and Mori were the only ones left outside. The two looked at each other, a touch of sadness in their eyes. They were going to miss the Host Club's adventures after they graduated. Trying to stay positive, Hunny said, "I'm sure this will be fun. We should enjoy spending time with the Host Club as much as we can."

Mori nodded to his cousin.

"Are you ready Takashi? Let's go!" Hunny bounded into the store, Mori following him at a much slower pace.

"Yeah."

**AN: Aww that scene at the end is so cute! Really long chapter right? But no worries, in the next one, it actually talks about what they do in Wal-Mart. The story is divided into four parts so I'll have 1-2 chapters for each group's adventure! I think I'll go with the Hitachiins first, even though I'm probably the worst at writing their characters. But, we'll just have to see how it goes. Read and Review as always and Thanks so Much for Reading!  
~Kellie ^-.-^**


	3. 12 Ways to Get Kicked Out of WalMart

**AN: I finally updated this! I've been working on this chapter for a few days. This is the Hitachiins' adventure and will be divided into two parts. There is some hints of twincest that I had to sprinkle in. I hope you enjoy!**

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN OURAN, WAL-MART, OR THE LIST OF THINGS TO DO TO GET KICKED OUT OF IT.**

Save Money, Live Better, Ouran

12 Ways to Get Kicked Out of Wal-Mart

Hikaru Hitachiin turned to his twin, who was busily typing away on his phone. Hikaru looked around the store once more. There were plenty of aisles and departments; it really was a huge place. They had just entered Wal-Mart, the commoner superstore, and they were stuck there for two hours. What would the boss do if they ditched this place and went home? It's not like this trip was going to be any fun; Haruhi wasn't with them.

"Got it!" yelled Kaoru excitedly.

Turning to see his brother, who was grinning ear to ear with delight, Hikaru asked, "Got what?" Not the best grammar, but it was still an appropriate response.

"I found the list," said Kaoru, displaying his Blackberry in front of Hikaru, "the list of things to do to get kicked out of Wal-Mart!"

Oh yeah! Hikaru had forgotten about that. Sometimes Kaoru was better at remembering things like that than him. "That's awesome! What should we do first?"

Sensing his brother's excitement, Kaoru smiled, pleased with himself for remembering the idea. "You can scroll through until you see some that you like."

With a mischievous smile, Hikaru scrolled down the list of things. Some were just weird, or too bold, or just not good enough. It was hard to find exactly the right thing.

"We should start small first," said Kaoru. "Then work our way up to the bigger and better stuff!"

Start small? Okay. Hikaru paged through the list once more, highlighting the ones he liked, until he stopped at one. Not too strenuous or too bold. They definitely weren't going to be thrown out for this one. Perfect for their first try at it.

Kaoru came up behind his brother and placed his head in between Hikaru's neck and right shoulder. Hikaru held up the Blackberry to his brother's face, and had to stifle a laugh as Kaoru's golden eyes broadened at the selections he had highlighted. Hikaru had picked some of the best things, and they both were willing to try them out. Hikaru scrolled up to his first selection, the easiest one they would do. Kaoru walked around in front of his brother. Their reflections faced each other. Golden eyes gleaming and a matching little devil smile on their lips, the brothers nodded simultaneously and ran off in different directions, ready to start their adventure.

_6. Move all "Caution: Wet Floor" signs to carpeted areas._

Aha! There was one, sitting in the middle of aisle seven. Checking to see if no one was watching, Kaoru ran up and grabbed the "Wet Floor" sign. _Now all I need is someplace to put it_, he thought, running out of the aisle trying not to be seen.

A few women looked up suspiciously as they saw a red haired teenage boy running through the lingerie section holding a "Wet Floor" sign. That wasn't something you see everyday, but most just ignored the abnormality of it and continued their shopping. Boys will be boys, as they say. And besides, there was a two for ten dollars sale on bras; that was a sale that could not be passed up.

Out of breath, Kaoru looked up to see the department he was in. He had run all the way from the grocery section to the shoe department. Looking down at his feet, Kaoru noticed the carpeted floors. Smiling, he "casually" dropped the "Wet Floor" sign and ran off. He was supposed to meet up with Hikaru back where they started.

_Happening at the same time in a different location..._

Hmmm…where were the "Wet Floor" signs? Hikaru casually strolled up and down the gardening aisles, hands in his pockets. Maybe there was one in that crowded aisle right there? Hikaru peered down aisle seven and, lo-and-behold, there was a sign there. There were also quite a few people; apparently there was a sale on fertilizers. Of course, what item wasn't on sale, what with Wal-Mart's rollbacks and all? Trying to be as inconspicuous as he could, Hikaru meandered down the aisle and grabbed the "Wet Floor" sign. He discreetly pushed past a few people, his sign in tow, and Hikaru made his way to the entrance where he would meet Kaoru.

Oh hey, there was a carpeted section! Hikaru wandered over to the shoe department and deposited his sign near the men's athletic shoe division. He started to walk towards the entrance once more when he noticed a "Wet Floor" sign on the floor of the women's athletic shoe division. With a laugh at how alike they thought, Hikaru walked back to his brother, ready for the next item on the list.

_8. Go into the dressing room, wait a few minutes, then yell, "There's no toilet paper in here!"_

Hikaru wanted to do this one on his own. Kaoru let him because in some ways, Hikaru was braver than him. Kaoru hid outside the women's dressing room, trying to bite back laughter as his brother casually strolled in, receiving strange looks from the other women inside.

_Don't laugh_, Hikaru told himself sternly. _If you laugh then you'll ruin the whole thing_. Hikaru walked into a dressing room and closed the door. Breathing deeply to calm the giggles that wanted to come out, Hikaru checked his watch. It was time.

"AWWW SHIT!" he shouted at the top of his lungs. "THERE'S NO GOD DAMN TOILET PAPER IN HERE!"

Kaoru started cracking up when he heard his brother's shouting. If it was even possible, he laughed even harder when every girl in the dressing room, and most in the whole women's department, ran away screaming. Hikaru executed it perfectly! Kaoru was definitely proud of his brother.

Hikaru walked out of the dressing room, feeling like a million bucks. Everything had worked perfectly and Hikaru was ready for the next task. Putting his arm around his still-laughing brother, Hikaru walked towards the front of the store, ready to plan the next way they would try to get kicked out of Wal-Mart.

_10. Hide between clothing and then jump out and yell "PICK ME"._

"Ready?" asked Hikaru, looking over his shoulder to his twin. Kaoru nodded and Hikaru climbed in between some clothes on a rack. Hikaru had to be silent and patient for this to work. The twins had stationed themselves in the girls' clothing department, but in different racks. Since Hikaru was the first one to hide, he had no idea where Kaoru was. But that didn't matter; all he had to do was sit and wait for someone to walk by. Minutes that seemed like hours slowly ticked by, and Hikaru was starting to get that feeling of having to pee when you're hiding for a long time.

After seeing that his brother was in position in the pajama rack, Kaoru turned and went to find his own rack. T-shirts? No, too short, he'd be seen underneath them. Jackets? Closer, but not quite. Dresses? Perfect. Kaoru climbed in and was pleased with his decision. The dresses were long enough to cover his feet and they weren't too hot. Looking up, he noticed that they were on sale too. Commoners must really love "rollbacks". Whatever that means. Now all he had to do was wait. Kaoru was curious to see who would get the chance to scare someone first. He almost wanted Hikaru to go first, so Kaoru could follow his example. Hikaru had done so well with number 10; he was bound to be good at this one. On the other hand, Kaoru also wanted to prove to his brother that he could do well too. It was tough to–.

"Alright sweetie, why don't you go pick out a pair of nice pajamas and mommy will get you a new dress."

"Okay mommy."

Hikaru was ready, poised to spring as soon as the pajamas rustled even the slightest bit. He could hear the footsteps coming, closer and closer. Until…

"PICK ME!" Hikaru shouted, bursting out from his hiding spot. The poor little girl in front of him was terrified; she looked only eight years old.

"Mommy!" the girl cried out in terror, but her mom wasn't paying attention. She had missed to whole ordeal because she was on the phone. Hanging up, the woman went over to the dress rack.

Hikaru had already gone. Now it was his turn. Kaoru had a bigger challenge though, because a mother would be harder to scare than a little girl, but she seemed distracted and would be caught off-guard by his yelling. The hangers above him jostled about slightly, and Kaoru took it as his cue to spring.

"PICK ME!" he yelled spreading his arms out wide as Kaoru jumped out of the rack. The woman looked petrified. If it could've, her hair would've turned white from shock. Grabbing her daughter's hand, the two girls' ran out the store, dropping the other items they had picked up.

"Alright! Nice job brother!" Hikaru said, walking over to Kaoru, giving his brother a high-five. "It feels great doesn't it?"

With a smirk Kaoru replied, "Oh yeah. So, what's next?"

_21. Make up nonsense products and ask newly hired employees if there are any in stock, i.e., "Do you have any Shnerples here?" _

With a quick look back to his twin, Kaoru caught his brother grinning to him. Taking energy from his smile, Kaoru gained enough confidence to walk up to the employee. He was glad that Hikaru had found out that this employee was new, which was perfect for this method.

"Hello sir," Kaoru began sweetly, "I seem to be having trouble finding the cadaver blender that you sell here at this fine superstore. Could you perhaps help me locate it?"

What? A cadaver blender? Who was this kid? Well, it was part of his training to help every customer. "Umm I'm sorry sir, but we don't have that here." Thinking about what the boy had asked for, the employee's eyes widened in shock. "Besides, that's terrible," he added disgustedly. A blender for dead bodies? What the hell was wrong with this kid?

"What? WHAT? Do you know who I am?" Kaoru screamed at the worker, purposely overreacting. "Do you have any idea in hell who I am? I am KAORU HITACHIIN! I have enough money to BUY your PATHETIC SOUL! What the HELL is wrong with you! You better find my GOD DAMN CADAVER BLENDER before I have ANOTHER body to throw into it!" He finished with a deathly dark snarl and a cackle that made him seem even crazier.

"Y-y-y-your insane man!" the employee shouted, fleeing for his life.

Both Hikaru and Kaoru watched the worker run and laughed. This was so much fun! They didn't care if they were being rude or obnoxious, this was great!

Hugging his brother, who was crying from laughing so hard, Hikaru said, "That was so awesome! You did such a great job!"

Kaoru looked up at his brother, trying to catch his breath. He had played the role pretty well and watching the guy run away left Kaoru with a hilarious feeling of satisfaction. "Thanks bro," said Kaoru, smiling as Hikaru ran his fingers through his twin's hair.

"Next one?" Hikaru asked sweetly, and the two walked hand-in-hand to the location of the next method.

_68. Run through the make-up department and yell, "There's a dead body in aisle 3!" _

Hikaru looked at his brother, matching his stance as the two got ready to run. They were both going to try way 68 together. Hikaru saw his brother lower his hand, all five fingers out. Hikaru waited for Kaoru's signal. Four fingers out. Hikaru looked ahead and saw that the path was clear. Three. He breathed in deeply, preparing his voice to scream. Two. Exhaling, Hikaru knew he was ready. One…

The twins sprang into action, tearing through the make-up department. Giving Kaoru a nod as they sped down the aisle, both boys raised their voices and yelled, "There's a dead body in aisle three!"

Turning around to see their work as they reached the end of the way, Hikaru noticed that the department wasn't that filled. Most people just ignored their yelling, but down in the first aisle, Hikaru could make out people moving. A tall blonde, teenage boy, excuse me, _idiot_, was pulling a girl out of the make-up department, the girl wearing an annoyed expression on her face. Hikaru could hear the boss yelling, "Come on Haruhi! Daddy doesn't want his little girl to be exposed to such awful things!"

Tamaki dragged Haruhi back towards the center of Wal-Mart and Hikaru could hear her saying, "Senpai, I'm sure there's no dead body. It sounded like the twins yelling that." Tamaki said something else, but they were too far away for Hikaru to hear.

As Hikaru watched the scene, Kaoru caught his breath and opened the file on his phone that had the "list of things to do to get kicked out of Wal-Mart". With a broad grin, Kaoru showed his brother what was the next highlighted item on the list.

Hikaru nodded and said, "I'll take this one."

_135. Walk up to a guy and say "Oh my god, is it you? Oh my god it is! I haven't seen you in so long!" Then kiss him. Then slap him and say "Why didn't you ever call me?" Then walk away. Much more affective if you're a guy.  
_"Here, that guy is perfect, said Kaoru to his brother.

Hikaru looked over the guy Kaoru pointed out. Tall, an older guy who was maybe in his upper twenties, with brown hair. He was standing next to a woman who Hikaru believed was his girlfriend. _Even better_, he thought, _now he'll look like a gay_.

Kaoru gave his brother a thumbs-up and had to bite his tongue to keep from laughing as Hikaru walked up to the guy, swinging his hips as he walked.

"Oh. My. God," said Hikaru, doing his best "homosexual voice". "Is it you? Ohmygod it is you! I haven't seen you in like forever!" he yelled, walking up to the guy. The girl next to him gave to guy a confused look. The man just shrugged it off until he was grabbed by Hikaru.

"What the–" the guy began as Hikaru pressed his lips to his.

Kaoru looked on in shock at Hikaru's boldness. There was no way Kaoru could kiss someone like that, that he didn't know.

Hikaru kissed the man forcefully. Trying to force his tongue in, Hikaru noticed that the guy wasn't allowing him to gain entry, which was expected. Hikaru ended the kiss, stepped back, and saw the guy's face.

"Wow I missed that," Hikaru faked sighed. Now he had to do the other part of the method. Hikaru drew back and slapped the man across the face, hard. "Why did you never call me!" Hikaru yelled. In a huff, he turned his heel and walked away.

"I didn't know you were gay," the woman said in a quiet disbelief. She walked away from the man who continued his shopping in a dazed state as he tried to comprehend what just happened.

Kaoru grabbed Hikaru and the two began laughing hysterically to each other. Gasping for breath, Kaoru managed to choke out, "That was so great Hikaru. I am so proud of you." Kaoru gently pressed his cheek to his brother's, who was still laughing.

"That felt so good," Hikaru gasped out. "I can't believe I didn't start laughing in the middle of it."

Smiling at his twin and removing his cheek because he didn't get a reaction from Hikaru, Kaoru said, "That was just brilliant. You have a lot of guts."

Hikaru checked his watch, still basking in his brother's pride. It was hard to believe that they only had one more hour in Wal-Mart. It was a little sad actually, they were having so much fun and Hikaru felt really close to his brother. "We only have about an hour left," he told Kaoru.

"Well then let's make the best of it," replied Kaoru, linking his arms with his brother.

**AN: Wow that was a reallllllyyyy long chapter! But it was so much fun to write! Just for those who are curious, I did directly copy the methods in italics from the list of 333 things to do to get kicked out of Wal-Mart that I found on Yahoo. Next chapter should be a little shorter, and is the seven final things they do to try to get kicked out of Wal-Mart. Read and Review Please! And thank you soooo much to every single reader! ~Kellie ^-.-^**


	4. 12 Ways to Get Kicked Out of WalMart 2

**AN: Hey guys sorry about the long update! I wasn't feeling totally up to snuff this week, which is why this chapter isn't very good. But as always, thanks for reading and sticking there with me guys. For the sake of the plot, the Hitachiins are going to be doing some of the ways out of order. And now, on with the (suckish) chapter!**

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN OURAN OR ITS CHARACTERS OR WAL-MART OR THE LIST OF THINGS TO DO TO GET KICKED OUT OF IT!**

Save Money, Live Better, Ouran

12 Ways to Get Kicked Out of Wal-Mart Part 2

"Sir, there appears to be some, umm, _trouble_, in the store."

Hmm? Dave Sullivan, the manager of the Wal-Mart that the hosts were in, looked up to see his assistant manager with a pile of papers. "What now?" he asked, his silver-gray brow furrowing in annoyance.

"The usual sir, I'm afraid. Two nuts doing thing on that god damn list. Pardon my French Mr. Sullivan."

Dave sighed. He threw out idiots trying things on that list about twice every month, if it got to be a big deal. People would normally come in to try one minor thing and leave without a disturbance. His assistant manager only reported problems when they were getting out of hand. "How many things have they tried?" he asked, almost glad to be away from the dreadful papers he had just received a few minutes ago.

"Well I hate to interrupt anything you were working on previously sir," the assistant manager started, gesturing to the papers on his boss's desk.

Dave tried to just coolly shrug off the most recent notice, but with a heading that read "Transfer of Ownership", it was hard to be calm. _Damn Ootori kid_, he thought. _And now some smart aleck kids. This day just keeps getting better and better._ "Just report to me what they've done," Dave said sharply, dismissing the contract on his desk.

The assistant manager held out the stack of files. "Oh well our reports say five sir, but they could be doing more as we speak."

_As the two gentlemen were speaking in the main office of Wal-Mart, the Hitachiins were busy with their own plan._

_177. Poke people and run away screaming, "Don't touch me!"_

"Do it Hikaru," whispered Kaoru excitedly. His brother slowly stalked up to a man and poked him in the side of his stomach softly. As the guy turned around to see who it was, Hikaru ran away screaming and flailing his arms.

"Don't touch me!"

Kaoru yanked his brother around the corner of the aisle. They guy they had bothered ignored the brothers, much to their annoyance. It wasn't fun if people didn't play along.

"No reaction?" Hikaru asked as he caught his breath.

"Nope," was Kaoru's sad response.

Hikaru was upset by this. What was wrong with people? And why didn't the method work? True, it wasn't as epic as their last method when Hikaru kissed a man, but a least a little bit of a reaction would be nice.

"This was the first time one didn't work," said Kaoru softly. "But maybe it was because you did it on a guy," he said more thoughtfully, as his brother started to laugh. "What's so funny?"

"'You did it on a guy'!" Hikaru quoted. "It's funny because it sounds wrong," he replied with a chuckle.

Kaoru chuckled along with his brother. They had barely gotten any enjoyment from the last method so they had to laugh about something. Kaoru grabbed his phone out of his pocket and opened up the file with the list on it. He smiled at the next technique they would try and started to plan how they would do it.

_231. Scream, "GET OUT OF MY YARD!" to everyone who walks by you._

Crushed that their last method wasn't as successful, Hikaru knew that he and Kaoru had to go all out on this one. Hikaru had a special spot picked out near the bakery and had sent Kaoru to get supplies. It wasn't exactly how the official list said to do it, but the Hitachiins liked to be original, it was in their nature.

*CRASH*

What was that? Hikaru turned to see his brother struggling under the weight of two lawn chairs, a side table, and a large blanket. He rushed to his brother's aide, taking some of the load off of Kaoru.

"Is that all ya got?" asked Hikaru sarcastically, as he walked over to his spot in the center of the bakery. Kaoru came up behind him and dropped all his stuff, then punched Hikaru in the back lightly.

"It's all you asked for _your highness_," Kaoru responded dryly. Annoyed that once again, he had been sent to grab whatever they needed, Kaoru let his twin set up the stuff.

With a laugh, Hikaru said, "Don't even think of comparing me to milord. That's a bigger insult in itself." He spread out the large, fluffy blanket and set up one lawn chair. Hikaru looked up and saw Kaoru nod as to say to set up his chair as well. Hikaru tried. He struggled to open it, but the stupid chair kept snapping back into its original shape. He heard a sigh behind him and saw Kaoru walk up and open the chair, flawlessly. Kaoru flopped down into the chair and glanced up at Hikaru.

"Sometimes, it helps to be more gentle."

Seeing that his brother was being serious, Hikaru had to stop himself from blurting out "That's what she said". Why was Kaoru being so grumpy? It was beyond him. Hikaru just sat down next to his brother.

People walking by gave them strange looks, but didn't say anything. It was quite an oddity though. Two young, attractive, teenage twin males, sitting in lawn chairs with a table between them, not to mention two glasses of lemonade, all on top of a red and black checkerboard picnic blanket, in the middle of the bakery. The action definitely deserved some strange glances, but the brothers didn't mind.

Hikaru noticed that Kaoru's mood hadn't improved much since they had been sitting there getting stared at. If it was a normal day, Hikaru would've just ignored it, but today was certainly not normal.

"Kaoru," he began, turning towards his brother. "If you're mad at me, I'm sorry, but we're in this together right? Here, next method, its all you brother. And I know just what we're going to do. But for now, can we focus on this one? I have a feeling it'll work well if we both try hard. So c'mon, can I have a smile?"

Each sentence he spoke, Hikaru moved closer and closer to his brother. Their faces were inches apart, and it was a wonder how Kaoru's measly little lawn chair could hold both of them up. Kaoru's eyes shined a little brighter at his twin's words and a broad smile spread across his face. Hikaru knew he had done the right thing, but he knew that he still had to finish up this round of brotherly love right. Taking Kaoru's face in his hands, Hikaru slowly moved even closer to his brother's face. Hikaru's soft lips delicately brushed across Kaoru's. _Now_, he thought, as he pushed in closer. Hikaru had closed his eyes, but he could still sense the happiness and love pulsing from his brother. Soon, oh too soon, Hikaru felt himself pull away. He opened his eyes to see Kaoru blushing madly as he stared over Hikaru's head. A small crowd of people had gathered around to watch their moment.

Hikaru sighed inwardly. Normally women _paid_ to see them fake brotherly love moments. Now, there were maybe ten people crowded around to see a moment of their _real_ twincest. Hikaru felt cheated. Couldn't they have a private moment alone for once? Sometimes, being so beautiful could be annoying.

Hikaru went back into his chair and stared up at the crowd around him. With a snobbish eye roll, he addressed the group, sounding annoyed. "Can we help you?" The people dispersed as they heard the distaste in his voice.

"Hikaru," a small voice said. Kaoru was still recovering from the shock of his brother kissing him.

"Kaoru," he replied softly, his sweetness returning.

"I love you Hikaru."

"I know," replied Hikaru walking over to his brother's chair once more. And once again, he kissed Kaoru. Just a small peck on the lips, but a kiss nonetheless. "And I love you. Now let's do this," he said, trying to get back on track.

~~~~~~~~Minutes Later as the Brother's Scoped Out Their Victim~~~~~~~~

"Hikaruuuu. This is boring. Can't we just pick someone already?"

Kaoru was back to his normal adorableness. _Well it beats having his all upset_, thought Hikaru. They had been chilling in their chairs for about ten minutes, and he still couldn't find the right person. A lot of the people who came to the bakery were women, most with children, and it just didn't seem right to scare them. Wait, what was that? Hikaru stood up slightly in his chair, seeing a tall dark-haired male walking towards the bakery.

"What is it Hikaru?" his twin inquired curiously.

"I found the perfect guy. He's walking over here. I think someone else is with him."

The two waited for their victims to walk closer. Hikaru turned and nodded to his brother, hoping that he would get the message to yell once the people rounded the corner. Here they come!

"Hey you!" Kaoru shouted.

"GET OFF OUR LAWN!" the twins screamed together.

"AHHH! Takashi! Hika-chan and Kao-chan are scaring me!" Hikaru saw a small blonde boy run away from where the twins sat.

"Mitskuni, come back," a low voice grumbled as the tall boy ran after the other one, who was now crying in a corner holding a stuffed bunny.

Hikaru turned towards Kaoru and saw that he had a similar expression on his face. They had messed up that time. Sure, it was absolutely hilarious to see the boy run in fear, but why did it have to be Hunny-senpai? Hikaru didn't realize that they guy he saw was Mori-senpai, but it was understandable that the pair would be in the bakery.

"We kinda messed up didn't we?" asked Kaoru.

"Yeah, it was funny, but I'd feel bad if I laughed. Man, we're really striking out aren't we?"

"Oh well, we need to stay positive," replied Kaoru, trying to brighten the mood. "Besides, you did promise that the next method was mine alone. And I plan to do well," he finished with a familiar devilish smile. Kaoru stood up and began to clean up their supplies, Hikaru following suit. Before they left the bakery, Kaoru looked over to see that both Hunny-senpai and Mori-senpai were fine, and were eating cookies from the free sample case.

_206. Throw a poke-ball at someone and yell, "PIKACHU, I CHOOSE YOU!"_

Hikaru adjusted Kaoru's red hat so it hid his red hair. Hikaru stepped back to admire is work. Blue jacket? Check. Black t-shirt? Check. Jeans? Check. Belt? Not quite ready. Hikaru told Kaoru to stay where he was and then ran down to the toy aisle. He looked up and down the aisles until he found exactly what he was looking for. To his surprise, Hikaru was able to carry back all six round objects without dropping any. He attached the balls to his brother's belt, except for one. Hikaru placed the remaining ball in Kaoru's green, fingerless-gloved hand. His outfit was all ready. Hikaru gave Kaoru a final look-over and stepped up to him to give him a hug of confidence. Hikaru could feel Kaoru's fingers running through his hair. It felt nice, sweet. Kaoru broke off the hug and walked past his brother, head held high.

Kaoru walked down to the toy aisle, which was a long walk because Wal-Mart was so huge, loving his outfit. Maybe they should cosplay as Pokémon characters in the host club. Kaoru could only imagine how the boss would react to Haruhi in a Pikachu costume. He finally reached his destination, prepared for anything.

A little boy, who was about six, tugged at his mother's sleeve and yelled, "Look mommy! It's Ash Ketchum!"

Not missing a beat, Kaoru responded in his best Ash impersonation, "That's right! I am Ash Ketchum from Pallet Town and I challenge you to a Pokémon battle!" Kaoru threw the Poke ball in his hand. "Pikachu! I choose you!" he shouted as the ball flew through the air and nailed the little boy right in the forehead.

"Mommy," the boy sniffled, on the brink of tears, "Ash hit me!" The mother gave Kaoru a dirty glare and took her boy out of the toy department.

Hikaru appeared out of nowhere, clapping to his brother and laughing. Kaoru started laughing when he saw how pleased Hikaru was with his performance, and gave a little bow to go along with the applause.

"Great job," Hikaru smiled to his twin. "Now let's get you out of that Ash, you look ridiculous." He wrapped his arm around Kaoru's waist and dragged him into a dressing room.

_327. Hide in a boys clothes rack, and when a boy with glasses walks by, scream, "You're a wizard, Harry!"_

Giggling as he pushed Hikaru into the t-shirt rack, Kaoru followed behind his brother. It had been hard to find a rack in the boy's department that was large enough to hold both of them. Kaoru was glad to be out of his Ash Ketchum cosplay, but he almost missed it. Having Hikaru slowly remove and replace the clothes on his body, then hug him…Kaoru gave a small shiver of delight.

"Cold?" smiled Hikaru, their brotherly bond stronger than ever.

"Umm… a little," replied Kaoru grateful for the excuse.

"Well then come here silly," Hikaru said as he wrapped his arms around his younger twin, pulling him close.

Excited to once again be in Hikaru's warm embrace, Kaoru felt his muscles relax. He could feel a hand leisurely slip into his front pocket. Kaoru tensed up, a little confused. Hikaru pulled out Kaoru's Blackberry and opened the phone. Releasing his brother, Hikaru scrolled through the list. So much for a loving hug.

"So now we wait for some guy with glasses to walk by. It'll be hard for us to find out if he has glasses without being seen, so I'll be the one looking, because I'm faster," Hikaru determined. He was back to being focused on the list of 333 things to do to get kicked out of Wal-Mart, much to Kaoru's disappointment.

Kaoru looked up to see his brother looking down on him, as if waiting for a response. Kaoru nodded and Hikaru poked his head out of the rack, scanning the aisles for their prey. Almost instantaneously, Hikaru drew his head back in.

"We're in luck brother!" he whispered excitedly. "I couldn't see the guy's face too well, but I'm positive he was wearing glasses."

Focusing once more on the task at hand, Kaoru waited for his brother's signal. This was becoming a more usual thing. Kaoru could barely hear the soft footsteps walking past them, but they sounded steady, unwavering, and confident. Hikaru gave his twin a curt nod. Apparently, that was the signal.

"You're a wizard Harry!" they yelled, and waited for the boy's reaction.

"What the hell?" was the angry and annoyed response moments later.

Kaoru turned to his brother. Terrified. Hikaru wore the same frightened expression. They knew that evil voice oh-too-well. A dark aura seemed to pulse around the whole department.

"You two. Get out here. Now." The Shadow King barked the order at them.

The Hitachiins slunk out of their hiding place and looked up, scared, at Kyoya's exasperated and evil expression. _What the HELL was Hikaru thinking,_ Kaoru shouted in his head. Anyone else would've been fine, but they just _had_ to yell at the Dark Lord. It also didn't help that Kyoya didn't seem to be in the best mood. Better than the Low Blood Pressure Evil Lord, who appeared when they woke him up early, but he was still frightening.

"Personally, I don't give a care about what the hell you two are doing," Kyoya began darkly, "but if it interferes with business, there's going to be some trouble. I also heard from a reliable source that you two performed one of your "scenes" in front of a crowd. You only host for _our_ customers and _only_ when they _pay_. You idiots."

Hikaru decided to be brave and stand up for both of them. "Senpai, we aren't hurting anyone. And what we do outside the host club isn't really your concern. Whether or not our "scenes" are real, I'm having a good time with Kaoru. And I'm sorry that we caught you off-guard, but we're going to continue with what we started. And there's nothing you can do to stop us," he finished with a challenge.

Mulling over Hikaru's sharp retort, Kyoya abruptly turned around a pulled out his cell phone. "Nothing I can do about it, eh?" he murmured, punching in a few numbers. He walked away from the brothers in his usual calm and confident manner.

Kaoru watched the raven-haired boy walk away. He turned to Hikaru after Kyoya was out of sight. "Okay, so that was seriously creepy."

Hikaru grabbed his brother's hand and pulled him towards the checkout. "We need to do the next technique, _fast_."

_279. Stand on the conveyer belt when your checking out and walk like its a treadmill... then ask for a speed increase._

Register seventeen was open. No one was in line. Hikaru dragged his brother towards the cashier. Kaoru was still a little shaken from their frightful encounter with the Shadow King, but Hikaru had a feeling they had to do the final two things fast. Before they got in line to "checkout", Hikaru turned to his brother and said, "Okay, you know what the last method is right?" Kaoru nodded. "When I get thrown out for this, I want you to do it. This one I'm doing is big and I have a feeling Kyoya called security on us, so we have to be fast. If you see any security guys, I want you to run Kaoru. Leave me behind and _run_. Do you understand?" Kaoru's eyes were wide from shock, but still he nodded. "I'm going in," finished Hikaru, giving one final look to his twin before he walked up to register seventeen,

"Can I help you?" the cashier asked. She was a young, pretty woman with a nice smile.

"Sure you can," replied Hikaru, placing his hand on the side of the conveyor belt. He pushed himself up to the top of it, until he was standing straight up on it.

"Umm sir, you need to get down," the cashier stated, confused by Hikaru's actions.

Hikaru began walking in place on the belt. "Can I have a speed increase?" he shouted.

"Run Hikaru!" a voice called to him, and Hikaru looked over the aisles to see Kaoru's fleeting shape. _Wow, he finally listened to me_, thought Hikaru, ignoring Kaoru's warning.

"There he is!" a gruff voice shouted.

_Here they come. I better make this fun._

Hikaru leaped down from the conveyor belt and took off running. He could feel the heavy footsteps of the security guards thundering behind him. Hikaru turned a sharp corner in hopes to throw them off. He chuckled as some idiots ran right by him. He had hidden behind a display in the video game department. Suddenly, Hikaru felt strong hands wrap around his waist and mouth. They had caught him.

"Hikaru Hitachiin?" He nodded as best as he could with the hand covering his mouth. "Please come with me." The guard dragged Hikaru towards the entrance where a circle of security guys stood. His captor released Hikaru into the circle as a man pushed through the guards to face Hikaru. The man looked like he was somewhere in his fifties, with silver-gray hair and dark blue eyes that were filled with worry. He had a nice gray suit on and he looked like the kind of person who demanded respect.

"Hikaru Hitachiin," the man began, "you've been hard to catch, haven't you? Fortunately, we received a tip of your location from a _source_. My name is David Sullivan and I am the current manager of Wal-Mart. For the acts of public disturbance, I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to leave."

Hikaru felt himself being led out the door. Finally, the list had worked. Finally, he had been thrown out. HOW AWESOME WAS THAT! He sat down on the curb, his mind whirling with the previous events. Hikaru was finally asked to leave. Took them long enough. He glanced at his watch and saw that they had about twenty minutes left before the host club would meet up. Now it was Kaoru's turn. Hikaru kicked back on the curb to relax, and waited for Kaoru to join him.

_290. Get a water gun and threaten someone with it. A cashier is usually a prime candidate. Then say in a low, dangerous voice (without collapsing into laughter) "Empty out the cash register." _

The toy aisle was in sight. Panting, Kaoru looked behind him to see if anyone was following him. Fortunately, he didn't see anyone. _Poor Hikaru_, he thought, _but I guess he knew what was going to happen_. Kaoru stopped in the Lego aisle, catching his breath from running. After he could finally breath normally, Kaoru burst out laughing. Seeing Hikaru up on the conveyor belt asking for a speed increase was too funny. It was too bad it was short lived. But now it was his turn. Kaoru left the Lego aisle and went to find the water guns. It was lucky that aisle three was well stocked with just the right thing. Kaoru pulled the latest model of SuperSoaker off the shelf and started walking towards the grocery section. Maybe he should have went there first?

Checking left and right to see if anyone was watching, Kaoru opened up a water bottle and poured it into his water gun. Weapon loaded and ready to go, Kaoru walked towards the checkout, SuperSoaker hidden behind his back. This wasn't as fun because Hikaru wasn't there, but is brother had asked him to do this technique on his own. So he would. This was for Hikaru.

"Welcome to Wal-Mart. Did you find everything you needed?" the cashier asked in a friendly manner.

Quickly getting into character, Kaoru revealed the SuperSoaker behind his back. "Empty the cash register," he growled menacingly.

Instead of being shocked, the aisle seventeen cashier was ready. "Oh, so you're the other one," she replied, pushing a button underneath the conveyor belt.

Other one? She must've meant Hikaru. That means…

"There's the other one!" a grumbly voice called out.

"Let's get him!" responded another.

Kaoru took off running, but something was slowing him down. Looking down at his hands, he realized he still had the SuperSoaker. Turning on his pursuers, Kaoru held up the water gun. _I really hope this works_, he thought, before pulling the trigger.

A blast of water drilled the first row of guards. Some fell, making those behind him slow up. Some were unfazed and pushed through the blast towards their target. Kaoru started running again, but he knew he couldn't outrun everyone. What a rush this was! He could feel his adrenaline pumping and a boost of speed kicked in. _Maybe I can get away. Maybe I–_.

Kaoru's boost of speed sent him flying into the arms of a security guard. "Got'cha," the man said coldly. Protesting against the man's hold, Kaoru tried to force his way free to no avail. He was being taken to the front of the store. Someone had already snatched the water gun from his hands, so he was weaponless and defenseless against these armed guards.

"Get outta here," a man yelled rudely, throwing Kaoru out the door onto into the parking lot.

He brushed himself off and heard a voice say to him, "So, they caught you too huh? But man, wasn't running from them fun?"

Kaoru walked over to sit next to his brother. "Yeah that was the best.

"We still have a little time before milord rallies everyone together. Why don't you tell me what happened?"

The two brothers sat there together, telling each other about their attempted escape from security, reminiscing over the many methods they tried. They had done it. It had taken twelve attempts, but they had gotten thrown out. And here they were at the end, like they were in the beginning. They were here, together, as brothers.

**AN: So that's it then. The Hitachiins adventure is now over. Sorry… and I'm sorry that it wasn't the best chapter. I was sick, but I typed it up anyway and just posted it even though I didn't really like it. Any and all suggestions are loved and appreciated. As always, thanks a million for reading and thank you for your reviews! Next adventure is Hunny and Mori! This should be fun and cake-filled!**

**~Kellie ^-.-^**


	5. The Quest for Cake

**AN: Hello again everyone! Welcome to Chapter 5, AKA Hunny and Mori's adventure! Instead of boring you with my rambling, on with the chapter!**

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN OURAN, WAL-MART, GOLDFISH, LITTLE DEBBIE, OR ROLEX! **

Save Money, Live Better, Ouran

The Quest for Cake

Hunny ran through the automatic doors of Wal-Mart and looked around in awe. There had to be a hundred different departments with maybe a thousand aisles a piece. It was so big!

"Takashi! This store is huge!" Hunny shouted, giving a small bounce of excitement. He looked around some more, trying to decide exactly where he wanted to go. "Wow, what is that?" Hunny asked, pointing to a shopping cart.

"Mitskuni, be careful," Mori warned as the blonde boy scrambled into the basket of the cart. He walked over to the cart where Hunny was in and tried to move it. Surprisingly, this commoner vehicle had wheels.

"Ohhh how cool! It moves! Push me around Takashi!" Hunny plopped down in the cart.

Mori maneuvered the cart through the front of the store, discreetly smiling at Hunny's oohs and ahhs. This commoner superstore was interesting to say the least.

Just as Mori pushed him through the last toy aisle, Hunny piped up, "Hey Takashi, can we go there?" He pointed a small finger towards a sign that said "Grocery".

"Yeah," was his cousin's stolid response.

Gripping Usa-chan tightly, Hunny held onto the cart as Mori forcefully pushed him to the grocery department. Hunny couldn't believe that he had forgotten about his plans. Usa-chan was hungry and the poor bunny needed some cake!

The sights and sounds of the crowded store whirled past Hunny as Mori ran their cart to the grocery section. Suddenly, the cart stopped and Hunny flew forward. He looked up to see his dark-haired friend bend down to pick up a box of bird feed. So that was it. Hunny smiled. No one knew this sensitive side of Mori, who loved any and all animals. Hunny remembered his cousin's tanuki and wondered if the little creature was still on the Morinozuka estate.

"Are you gonna get some bird seed Takashi? That would be so cool to see all the cute little birds!"

Mori nodded to the smaller boy. Both of them would enjoy seeing some Fork-tailed Storm Petrel and Japanese Wagtails. The two would sit outside on weekends and just watch the different wild animals surround them. It was a peaceful and relaxing time for both of them, and they were grateful for the escape from the hum-drum of daily life.

Mori pushed the cart farther along, scanning the different aisles of food. He ran through his head a list of items they might have needed. Tea, cake, ice cream, strawberries, cake, milk, cake, eggs, cake. Uh-oh, Mitskuni was rubbing off on him. He shook his head to clear his cake-filled thoughts and Mori noticed Hunny staring at him with wide eyes. Realizing that the boy had said something to him, Mori murmured a low, "What?"

Unfazed by his friend's slight ignoring of him, Hunny repeated cheerfully, "Usa-chan told me he wanted to go to the bakery." He held out the stuffed bunny in question to Mori. The dark-haired boy nodded and pushed the cart towards the bakery. They were in the back of the grocery section though, and the bakery was in the front, so they probably should pick up some things on their list on their way to the front.

"Sir, would you care for a free sample?" a sweet voice asked and an elderly woman held out a small cup filled with crackers.

"Oooh. Wow," Hunny said in awe, reaching out for the cup. "How nice. Thank you miss."

The worker smiled at the boy's cuteness, but what were those pink flowers hopping around him? She disregarded it and blamed the odd sight on her old age.

"Look Takashi! They're shaped like fish!" Hunny acknowledged, chomping down on a cracker.

"That's right," the woman said, "They're Goldfish. "The snack that smiles back"." She chuckled at the blonde boy's broad smile as the taller boy pushed the cart away.

"Hey Takashi," Hunny mumbled, talking around some cracker crumbs, "do you know what time it is?" They had wandered through the different departments for a little while and they had spent some time in the grocery section, so Hunny was curious to know how much time they had left before they would meet up with everyone.

Mori looked at his 40Kt gold, diamond encrusted Rolex watch. Surprisingly, almost forty-five minutes had already passed, and they hadn't gotten anything yet, except for the bird seed. Maybe he should pick up something for Satoshi. _I wonder what he'd like. Something he and Chika could share_. Mori added that to his cake-filled mental grocery list and pushed Hunny past the frozen food aisle.

"Brrr… It's cold," shivered Hunny, "but when it's cold, it must mean ice cream!" He gripped the right side of the cart, maneuvering it towards the ice cream display. As Mori slowed the shopping cart to a stop, Hunny carefully sat Usa-chan down in it and hopped out himself.

"Takashi, what's a rollback?" he asked, sounding out the strange word slowly.

His cousin responded with an indistinguishable grunt. Mori didn't know either. Hunny ignored the odd word and picked out his ice cream flavors. Cookie dough, cookies and cream, moose tracks, chocolate chip, mint chocolate chip for Chika, caramel, and fudge brownie. He piled the containers into the cart, careful not to hurt Usa-chan. Once Hunny was satisfied, he nodded to Mori and the taller boy lifted him back into the cart, which was now full of cold ice cream.

_Well, that's one thing off the list_, thought Mori, as he went down the aisle that had different types of tea.

"Wow! I had no idea there were that many different types of tea!" exclaimed Hunny, looking at the shelves and shelves of different products.

Mori walked past the cart a little, looking for Hunny's favorite flavor of tea. It might not have been the same quality that Hunny was used to, but they were running low. Chucking lowly to himself, Mori picked up another item and tossed it to Hunny.

With sharp reflexes, Hunny grabbed the item and couldn't help but laugh. "Hescafe Instant Coffee" the label read. Hunny remembered back to when Haruhi first joined the Host Club and she had bought the same kind of instant coffee. Laughing softly, Hunny thought of Tamaki's performance when he first decided to have the commoner's coffee.

_"I WILL DRINK THIS COFFEE!"_

Sadly, Hunny thought of how all their good times would slowly come to an end. Mori and he were graduating soon, and they would have to leave the Host Club behind. All their friends. Tama-chan, who had convinced Hunny that it was okay to be himself and to love cute things and cake. Kyo-chan, who always made sure the Host Club's funds stayed intact. Hika-chan and Kao-chan, who always kept him entertained with their pranks. And Haru-chan.

Hunny blinked away tears forming in his eyes. Mori was watching him and gave a small nod of acknowledgement to the small boy's tears. They were both going to miss it. But going in, they decided to have the best time they could, while it lasted. Dropping the container into the half-full cart, Hunny picked up Usa-chan. Like Mori, his bunny was always there for him. Giving it a soft squeeze, Hunny sat down in the cart and Mori pushed it out of the aisle. It was amazing what a little container of instant coffee could do.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Line Break!~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Mori looked over the full cart once more. There was a space open from where Hunny was sitting. Now the blonde was over looking at different Little Debbie products, pointing out different boxes of snacks that he wanted. They had gotten almost everything on their list. All that was left was the cake for Usa-chan. The stuffed bunny sat discarded in the cart.

"Takashi, can we get these? A stack of boxes that went over the top of Hunny's head towered toward Mori. "I only picked out a few of the ones I wanted," stated Hunny as his cousin took over half the load from him and dropped it into the cart without a word.

Hunny placed his half of the stack in the very full cart and realized he had no seat. Mori started pushing the cart down the next aisle, towards the bakery. Hunny shrugged and ran up in front of the cart, walking beside it. Cutely smiling to the tall boy as they rounded the corner, Hunny said, "Hey Takashi, do you think–"

"Hey you!" a familiar voice shouted to the two third years.

"GET OFF OUR LAWN!" screamed two voices in unison, startling both of the boys.

Recognizing the voices and seeing the twins' red hair, Hunny yelled, "AHHH! Takashi! Hika-chan and Kao-chan are scaring me!" He took off running to the opposite side of the bakery.

Mori didn't show his surprise so transparently. Regaining his composure, he gave a stern look towards the Hitachiin brothers. What were they doing? Hikaru and Kaoru sat in lawn chairs in the middle of the bakery. Seeing guilty looks on both their faces, Mori grabbed the cart and pushed it to where Hunny sat on the floor whimpering. "Mitskuni, come back."

Once he reached the back corner of the bakery, he found Hunny in the corner, obviously still scared. "Mitskuni, it's okay," he said, embracing the smaller boy. Once Hunny had gotten over the initial shock of the incident, Mori got up and retrieved the bunny from the shopping cart. Hunny smiled broadly as Mori handed over Hunny's most prized possession.

"Oh, I wonder what that is." Hunny said, pointing to a case in the middle of the floor with chocolate chip cookies inside. He saw a little girl skip up to the case, grab a cookie, take a bite, and then skip off back to her mother. Free cookies? Hunny couldn't believe that it was possible. He ran up the case with Mori following close behind. There didn't seem to be anything wrong with just taking one. He shrugged his shoulders and thrust a small hand into the container, grabbing two free cookies. He handed one to Mori, and proceeded to eat his own. Mmmmm… It was good.

Brushing cookie crumbs off his face, Hunny looked at his surroundings. They had finally reached the bakery! "Now that we're in the bakery, we can find Usa-chan some cake!" Hunny couldn't believe that they had spent almost all their time at Wal-Mart shopping, but they still hadn't gotten any cake! Hunny ran over to a glass display case and his eyes grew wide in shock. There was so much cake!

Mori followed Hunny to the case and smiled at the small boy's enthusiasm. Finally, the cake had been found.

"Is that the one you want Usa-chan?" Hunny asked his bunny, which gave him the same unchanging expression it wore in return.

"Can I get you two something?" a sweet voice asked. A baker walked up to the boys and grabbed her keys for the display case. Hunny pointed out each cake he wanted and the baker gladly gave it to him, under the influence of Hunny's cuteness.

Once seventeen cakes had been stacked up in the already packed cart, Mori held his hand out. "That's enough Mitskuni," he said. Both Hunny and the baker seemed a little upset, but when Mori said it was enough, then it was enough.

"Thank you miss!" Hunny yelled cutely as both the boys walked away from the alluring case of cakes.

Mori glanced at his Rolex once more. They had about ten minutes before it was time to meet up with the rest of the Host Club. He pushed the cart towards the checkout. Register seven was just opening, so they were first in line.

Working together, the third years unloaded the cart and placed the items on the conveyor belt. The cashier uncaringly scanned every product. Just going through the motions and not noticing the piles of sweets and, more importantly, the final bill.

"Your total today is… _$432.17_!" the worker said, surprised. Who spends $400 on groceries, in _Wal-Mart_?

Hunny looked sheepishly to his cousin. $400 was quite a bit, and even though they were rich, Hunny knew Mori wouldn't be too happy about spending that much. Unsure about what to do, Hunny waited for the dark-haired boy to make a decision.

"Umm maybe I should ask my manager about this. Maybe something isn't right with the computer," the clerk piped up. He left the register to see his boss walking down the checkout, rubbing his temples and mumbling to himself. The worker could only catch the silver-haired man mutter something like, "Damn these rich people". Disregarding the mumblings, the cashier signaled his boss over towards the register.

"Mr. Sullivan sir, I believe there may be a problem with the computer. It's saying that their bill is over four hundred dollars!"

Sighing subtly, Dave walked over to the register and looked over the computer. Everything seemed normal. He faced the two boys who were checking out. They looked rich enough to afford this bill; he wasn't going to offer them a discount. _Why are all these rich kids ruining my store, _he thought.

"I'm sorry to say guys," he said, "but everything is working perfectly. If you don't have the money to pay, I'm sure you can put some things back and–"

"But Usa-chan wants cake!" Hunny interrupted, holding out his stuffed bunny.

"Well, umm that's fine," Dave continued, "But if you can't afford it the some things–"

Hunny couldn't believe that this guy was making them put some food back. They _needed_ everything they had picked out!

"Fine." Mori interrupted the man in the silver suit this time. He grudgingly pulled out a golden credit card and handed it over to the cashier. As much as he didn't want to pay that much, Mori also didn't want any conflict.

The clerk swiped the card and Dave walked away, resuming his grumbling about all the rich kids in his store and how much trouble they were causing him.

"Thank you Takashi!" Hunny exclaimed, giving the tall boy a hug. Working together once more, they loaded up the cart with their now-bagged goods, and proceeded out of the store.

"Hunny-senpai! Mori-senpai!" shouted two voices simultaneously. The Hitachiins were sitting on the curb near the exit of the store. They were smiling and laughing to each other. "Boy do we have a story to tell you!"

"One second Hika-chan and Kao-chan," Hunny replied, fishing Usa-chan and a small tea cake out of a bag. "Usa-chan wants some cake!"

Once the bunny had finished its meal, the twins proceeded to tell the third years about their adventure. "And then they threw _me_ out," finished Kaoru.

Hunny and Mori looked at each other and smiled. They would both miss hearing about the twins' different pranks and stories. The older boys shared a knowing glance, both reading each other's thoughts. The Host Club's misadventures were always fun, and they had all grown so close these two years. Being a host had made them all better people.

"So, what'd you guys do?" Hikaru asked.

The cousins gave each other a quick look and went to sit down next to the twins. There were about five minutes left before everyone else joined them. Mori grabbed their shopping cart filled with sweets and pushed it over to join the Hitachiins.

As the cart rolled over the curb, a single bag dropped out of the cart. Hunny leaned down and picked it up, smiling bitter sweetly at the item inside. "Hescafe Instant Coffee" the label read. Yup, they were going to miss the Host Club.

**AN: Aww that was a **_**sweet**_** chapter! Hahaha. Well thanks everyone again for reading, I really appreciate it, because now I have something to do when I'm bored in study hall! Yay! Read and Review as always and I'll be back eventually with Tamaki and Haruhi's chapter! This should be fun! By the way, to everyone who told me to feel better, thanks a bunch! I do feel better and peppier, which is why there are so many exclamation points in my author's notes! Hahaha, I'm going to shut up now. Thanks again and R&R!**

**~Kellie ^-.-^**


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